are you still with me?

Back in April I asked for your help.  In the post {are you with me} I made a request for your good wishes for my sister who was in the hospital.   You came through for me.  To many of you it may have been the introduction to Shannon.  For many it was my introduction to you as you left a comment for the first time.  It was a wonderful few days to see all the kind words pour in and to hear Shannon's reaction after being put in the spotlight.  What I'm realizing now is that because I shared her with you here, you are all invested in her.  YOU know that she mattered to me.  You are offering your kind words to me this time.  You get it. 

 

In the last 13 days of her life I was privileged to spend every possible minute with her.  I witnessed grace.  I witnessed strength.  I witnessed faith.  I witnessed love.  I witnessed power - power of God, power of medicine, and power of spirit.  I watched nurses who knew by experience that the end was near yet continued to give Shannon respect and dignity and control.  I will never forget some of the gestures they made to her husband Andy, and to our family, to make us more comfortable as we held vigil.  I will never forget that many of them wore PINK - pink shirts or pink socks, as though there was a Shannon Street Team.  She was dressed in pink so we got her groovy pink socks to change into everyday.  The socks got comments from anyone who had to come into the room - visitors or staff.  Pink is her color. 

I have this idea.  I want to acknowledge the staff on 7B of the U of M Hospital where my sister spent the last 4 months of her life.  I especially want to recognize those who I got to know - the professionals who cared for her and cared about her.  I think it would be a very powerful thing to see a box of PINK socks show up on the 7th floor.  With the box will come a note that will explain the gesture and the message.  

I will tell the story of my sister who courageously battled cystic fibrosis.  I will share the story of how I watched nurses and aides and therapists and doctors let Shannon be in control.  They offered her respect, dignity, privacy, and honesty.  I will share how we were all wearing PINK the last few days of her life - family and staff.  I will share how important their role is - not only in the care as described on the charts, but in what they offer that is off the charts.  Off the charts. 

I want there to be hoards of pink socks that spill out on the counter of the nursing station.  I want the staff on 7B to feel thanked, to feel appreciated, to feel validated.  I want them to know I was paying attention.  I want them to know I saw what they did....I was listening and watching and recognized the angel within them.  I want each person (man or woman) to get a pair of pink socks and to put them on the next day and think about the shift they are about to begin.  How they conduct themselves may have a huge impact on someone that day.  {Shouldn't we all think that way everyday?}   Someone is healing, someone is hurting, someone is lonely, someone is dying.  Someone may be dying.  How a nurse treats the patient really makes a difference.  How each of us walk the halls can make a difference.  Holding someone's hand as they die doesn't get you a bonus or a gold star on your paycheck if you are a nurse.  But it might get you a pair of Pink Socks that are an offering of gratitude and validation to be worn with pride as the practice of making a difference continues.

I want there to be an a-ha moment on 7B that radiates to 7A and the rest of the 7th floor....and the 6th floor, and the 5th floor, and the coffee shop, and the pharmacy, and the clinic where the Cystic Fibrosis patients go each month,....and the nearby hospitals, and - well you get it.  I want THINK PINK to be more than Breast Cancer awareness....I want THINK PINK to be more than Shannon and Cystic Fibrosis awareness.  I want it to be more than being about Pink Socks.  In fact, forget THINK PINK and make that PINK WINK.  I want each of us to begin every day with the awareness that what we do and how we behave may directly affect someone....As you put on your socks, or your shoes, say a little prayer or give a little thought to how you will use this day, every day.  We can all wear a wink.

 

So here is the mission:  send me a pair of pink socks.  That's it.  Men's or women's, long or short.  A little or a lot of pink, any shade - dark or light.  I will gather until mid August.  And I will send in one humungo box to the University of Minnesota Hospital, floor 7B, where they take care of patients with Cystic Fibrosis.  It's one of the ways I want to honor the memory of my sister.  It's one of the ideas I had for offering thanks to the caregivers.  When I asked for your good wishes I told you the nickname for CF is Sixty-Five Roses.  So you guessed it....

Send to P.O. Box 73, Piscataway, NJ 08855.  Let's call the due date August 15.  Many thanks.  I close my eyes and think of the dozens of you who have reached out to me at this time and I am so moved.  Truly.

 

 

Comments

[Chris]

Pink socks are on the way.

[Maj Carita]

Pink Wink coming soon! ;)

[Randi]

Wow. Beautiful.
If it wasn't midnight, I'd go buy them right now!
Pink socks flying your way soon!

[Cath Sheard]

I *get* it - pink winging it's way form New Zealand.

[Joanne]

What a lovely way to honor your sister. I just found your blog today, as I was doing some research on CF. My daughter is currently dating a young man with CF and it certainly looks like he could very well be my future son-in-law. He was told today he could not have children "normally" but that it wasn't impossible. I knew of this possible problem some time ago and had discussed it with my daughter. Her boyfriend hadn't really been told about it, but today his dr. finally went over it with him.

Not sure why I'm telling you this, but it does sound like you and your sister had a wonderful relationship. I'm going to see if I can find some pink socks to send.

[Sarah (Flo)]

consider it done

[Deb ABel]

Okay

[caty]

I will! what a wonderful gesture! Thank you to invite us for this. A big hug!

[Judy N]

What a wonderful idea.

Count me in!!

Until later,
Judy

[Katy]

Well, I shudder to think of wearing socks in Texas in August and, I'm sorry to say, I never liked pink, myself - but - I'll be off in search of pink socks this weekend! Great idea!

[Carrie]

There will be pink socks on their way, I promise! This is a brilliant idea :)

[Louisa Cunningham]

more pink on its way to a you with love and hugs from the land down under!!!
Louisa in sydney

[forcryeye]

Count me in girlfriend. I am honored and delighted to join in the pink wink brigade! What a wonderful gesture to remember not only Shannon, but those who took care of her. You are one in a million!

[Kelsey]

Oh.... Shannon would be SO proud of you M!!! Pink socks coming at you from me too. Hugs to you and your family.

[Barbara]

What an amazing idea and an incredible gesture. I would be delighted to particiate in your pink wink. Sending more hugs your way!

[Marlynn]

OH boy - A pink sock search this weekend. Will have them in the mail to you before you know it! Thank you for sharing your last days with Shannon with us. I hope you know how very special that was for us and I hope it also comforted you. Sounds like she had a wonderful staff taking care of her and was totally surrounded by love from everyone.

[belinda]

my SINCERE CONDOLENCES!! guess where i'm heading tonight after work ...

[Kaz]

Michelle I have been offline with PC probs, and just heard about this today, I didn't know your beautiful sister had passed away, I'm so sorry for your loss, and that of her husband and all of your family and friends. So sad for you xoxo
I will have pink socks in the mail tomorrow first thing. I know you will exceed your goal, but good luck anyway.
best wishes Kaz xxx

[MNScrapbookmom]

My original post didn't show - so I am going to write another one.
I am in the pink !!! Today was my first visit to your blog, and I am so glad that I stopped by. Sending pink your way from Minnesota to NJ, back to Minnesota with love. ¥

[michelle ward]

MNScrapbookmom aka Kyra - I just visited YOUR blog. You have blown me away. Happy tears. Thanks.

[Heather Bradley]

I am so sorry for your loss. The story you shared is beautiful and it is clear that your sister was so loved and treasured. Your idea is a wonderful one and I will be honored to send some pink socks your way. Blessings to you, Heather

[Anna]

Such a beautiful idea! Been there. CareGivers who live up to that Title deserve all the thanks and recognition we can give them. Pink socks coming soon!

[Julie Prichard]

With you? Are you kidding?? OF COURSE. I'll find some socks and get them out to you!

[Renee]

Pink socks are on the way. Me thinks you will be getting more than 65 pair.

Love, Renee

[JeriAnn]

Michelle, I am "pinking" of you and Shannon and will send socks your way. May I include some children's socks for youngsters at the clinic?

[inge Bekaert]

I'm moved to tears..again...
I'm in...

Inge from Belgium

[Ellen-Mary]

Absolutely! What a great idea!

[Monica]

Michelle,
YOU GOT IT!

Thank you for allowing us to help you meet your goal. I understand that NEED of wanting to do something. I GET it. I'd be delighted to pick out a pair that's special. Count me in.

And Michelle, I also wanted to add...

my brother has been attending school for longer than I can remember, ever since I turned 15. He works schedules that the rest of us would never. It is not uncommon for him to work over 100 hours a week as a Pediatric Surgeon in training. Long hours, lack of sleep and food on the go...days and days of it... he makes it a point to treat each patient as a person and not just a statistic despite that the regular attendees push him to move faster, treat more, and talk less. Thank you for remembering these individuals who showed Shannon the love and support she so deserved. Thank you for being the person you are.

The power of SISTERHOOD. I get it.

~Monica :)

[gaby braun]

I'm happy you're back, and with this wonderful homage to your sister and all the people who assisted your sister.
I have pink soks, very old, but iI love them.
For this purpose I'll buy some news and send it to you.
You are a very special person.

[gaby braun]

I'm happy you're back, and with this wonderful homage to your sister and all the people who assisted your sister.
I have pink soks, very old, but iI love them.
For this purpose I'll buy some news and send it to you.
You are a very special person.

[gaby braun]

I'm happy you're back, and with this wonderful homage to your sister and all the people who assisted your sister.
I have pink soks, very old, but iI love them.
For this purpose I'll buy some news and send it to you.
You are a very special person.

[gaby braun]

I'm happy you're back, and with this wonderful homage to your sister and all the people who assisted your sister.
I have pink soks, very old, but iI love them.
For this purpose I'll buy some news and send it to you.
You are a very special person.

[michelleinfantino]

I am a nurse and if something like this showed up at my workplace I'd be completely moved. Completely.

They will so appreciate this gesture. We feel so unappreciated at times. I'm so glad you had wonderful nurses during your sister's stay. I'm sure they will not forget your sister or your family either.

I will send you some pink socks in the next couple days. Something tells me you'll end up with more than your goal!

[Penny Stuart]

Oh Michelle, I am in awe of your strength. You are truly a wonderful woman, with a huge heart. To offer such a awesome gift when you are hurting. You do your Sister proud, she is smiling down on you. I want to be a part of "Pink Wink", I will send a pair shortly. Your idea is surely one to fill the hearts of all who open the box as well as those who hear about it.
xoxoxo
Pen

[Linda Warlyn]

Pink socks coming right up! An incredible idea and post. I agree with Kelsey, Shannon is so proud of you, Michelle. xoxox

[Mary Ann]

I'm so sorry to come by and read about the loss of your dear sister. My deepest sympathies, dear Michelle.

[Pat from Chicago]

Dear Michelle,
I'm so sorry for your loss--I just logged in after being absent for awhile and saw the post about your sister. I dread losing my sister--anything would be better than that and I send you my deepest sympathy. I'll be off to look for pink socks, although I've never seen men's socks that were intentionally pink! If if helps, your sister knows how much you love and miss her--all things are clear in Heaven. Bless you and strength to you.

[Shelley]

It is so nice that you can take such a hard time in your life and turn it around into something so very positive. I wish I could see the looks on the faces of those nurses when they open that box. I'd be proud to help out - socks on the way in tomorrow's mail! Thinking of you...

[carlene]

so sorry to hear about your sweet sister...how fortunate she was to have such a loving sister as you...please just know that my thoughts are with you and your sis...and you know I love me some pink, so I'll be on the lookout for pink sox and will be sending you some so you can keep spreading that *pinkwink* ;)
xoxoxoxo
carlene

[eb]

winkin' pink Michelle - you bet!

I'm with you - you INSPIRE...

deeply

xox - eb.

[Art Tea Life]

I think Your Pink Wink is kool. You got IT !

I have thought of you often and didn't know what to say.

Thinking of you still.

Love, S.

[Kathryn-collage diva]

Hi Michelle, When I first read your post this morning tears filled my eyes and covered my face. "Begin every day with the awareness that what we do and how we behave may directly affect someone" this is soooo true. I hope we all pick up this message and live with it. When I broke from the computer to get my morning coffee, I saw Shannon's smile and was instantly calmed. I took a picture of her smile knowing that when I returned from work, and after cooking dinner, that I would post it on my blog. I'm inviting my blog visitors to *pink wink.* Swing by and you'll see Shannon smiling back at you! xoxo kathryn

[Cindy Dean]

I will be going to the store tomorrow to find those pink socks. Sending hugs...and warm wishes...

[suzanne]

This is such a great idea. I love how you are turning your sorrow into something so positive...I love that you recognize how something small (pair of socks) will have a huge impact on the people you will be touching with this effort. I love that gestures such as yours encourages others to pay-it-forward, as well! And I love the whole "wink" concept!

[Rosie]

Whether they arrive in time or not, I shall be sending pink socks... and fingers crossed the Royal Mail get their act together!
I think you are such a treasure - and the pink wink socks thing will be a historical event - please take pics and give us a follow-up Michelle?
You & Shannon truly rock!
xoxoxo

[Manja]

I stopped on your blog today not knowing about the fact, that your sister died. My deepest symphaty for you and the whole family! Your idea is wonderful. Tomorrow morning I will go to town to buy pink socks - just hoping, the post will reach you in time from Germany, keep my fingers crossed.
Big hug!

[lelia]

This is a wonderful idea : ) I'll be shopping in the next few days

[tina]

pink socks on the way! a great tribute to shannon and all who cared for her.
Thank you!!

[&rew]

I will be sending you the socks tomorrow (Saturday Aug 2). &rew

[Marylinn Kelly]

A cotton candy sky, pink socks on the wing. A beautiful, open-hearted idea that could become something huge. Much love to you and your family.